The... something by Liza

Mr. Pollicutt, I really tried to make it as understandable us I can...

And less weird too... But it turned out like that.

xx.xx.1990

"Darkness.
What do you see in the darkness? What are you afraid of?"

"Every single night, if you open your eyes you can see how all the nightmares are crawling in the corners. You can see how they are awaiting for you to come, and how they call you in order to dry your soul out... They are always close to you: fears of your childhood and phobias, betrayals and memories. Every single night."

"Then I shall... show you."

xx.xx.2009

"Pain..."
It hurts, when every day, every evening you close your eyes, so that a ray of the falling sun doesn't pass through your eyelids.
It hurts, when every day you shiver from thousands of needles of the sunset as they pierce your skin.
Hurts, when they tear you apart. Hurts, when they go into your heart.
It hurts to scream, scratching your throat, and not to turn around, never turn around. Torturing.
And in the greates moment of phoenix's flight, in the peak of sun's beauty, it hurts even more - it hurts when the bird cries, cries in the only exctasy, cries with happiness, cries from eternal pain, cries to the upcoming death - awaiting for it, for this instand decline - awaiting for the second when it explodes with red and orange and crimson... it hurts.

"If you open your eyes, you will die"

One more second, and you can't stand this pain anymore; and all the thoughts are dancing, dancing in the insanity; and you can't keep your eyes closed, you can only turn around - put all your strength into this one movement! - and meet this bird; and from then you will only be a firefly flying towards the flames, and all your life will be condensed to love towards the fire and its love towards you; and it seems like if you fly a bit closer, if you stretch your arms a bit further you'll become a one unique creature together with the light, and you will die together, forever as one...

...
The night comes.

Blood on your hands, blood on your eyes.
As usual, you realise yourself lying on the floor, trembling from the unstoppable cry.
Still not used to realising you are alive.

The faraway stars are shining calmly, diffusing slowly through the mist-like tulle... the moon is singing. Glowing dust is covering the face, the hands, the clothes... like if a giant bird, consisting of billions of sunlight particles, has just fallen apart in this dark room; died and disappeared.
Calming...
Blind eyes can see everything here - they feel how the night sky is shimmering behind the window, they feel that the burning hell has died away. The darkness is caressing the skin; soft wind that flies into the opened window is gently playing with silver hair.
And you can laugh... people would think, you are insane - and they'd be right.
Laughter, like morning bells, illuminate the night and greet it; cry, as a requiem for the sun, by its elegant etude finishes the tragedy of sunset.
Stars are laughing together with a human, and they are whispering, whispering about the dreams that didn't come ture, about the fairytales.

"Do you want us to show you the sun?"
"Can you?" - with a hope, with a smile...
"Of course, we can" - and they will start speaking in a soft and quiet voice.

It will be a long long story about the peach-coloured sun, rising to the skies every morning; about shy sunrays that fly into the friendly opened window and slide along the faces of the sleepers giving them good dreams; about someone who will wake up, scaring the sunbeam, and the sunbeam will then jump back on the wall from that someone's nose. The story will tell about the puddles sparkling in the sunlight, and about the playful rain who leaves these puddles, and about the happiness of living; it will tell about the rainbow shooting up from east to west and linking different people's thoughts together.
It will also be a story about a girl, who was never scared of darkness. About the sunrays dancing in her hair and glowing - just like a halo; about her smile. The starts will tell how every night she says farewell to them, and how she greets the sun by singing. She will link the day and the night, she will be the daybreak and the sunset herself.
The stars will tell, how the essence of the Moon and the essence of the Sun will show that girl the only right way, and how she will go through many obstacles to find her happiness. The stars will tell, how her eyes will shine with amber, and how the stardust will settle down on her lips. The stars will tell, how she won't make a mistake.
And you will listen to that story and you will smile, and you will see all that, and a happiness of that simple little dream will overflow your heart.
Until the moment, when the first petal of daybreak flame burns your skin.


хх.хх.1990 v.2

"Darkness.
What do you see in the darkness?"

Unclear memory... Pain; a human is afraid of pain; a human is afraid of darkness, but... What is that? Crimson red and silver in fromnt of the eyes...

"What are you afraid of?" - The voice is slightly sad.
"I'm afraid of... making another mistake."
Whose words are there? I'm afraid of darkness... am I?

"Good." - the speaker smiles.
"Then shall you be the daybreak, shall you be the sunset; live with the sun and die with the sun, following the melody of night."